take a chill pill

I just found out The Perks of Being a Wallflower is being made into a movie. I looked over the casting and foamed out the mouth. I am really excited for this. The book is remarkable. I thank Lisa (via Tyler) for letting me read it. Honestly, it really did open my eyes and change my opinion of a lot of things... one of those you know.

Through the eyes of New York Magazine, I am elated and anticipating the "lo-fi pleasures of the proudly old-school, hand-drawn Winnie the Pooh. Less a reboot than a calm return to the solace of the Hundred Acre Wood, the film should play as soothingly as Xanax." I am ready to pop that pill and chillax.

Last night, my roommate Frances and I watched the film adaptation of Michael Cuningham's A Home at the End of the World. My only other experience with Cuningham's works is the movie The Hours, which the book the movie is based on won Cuningham the Pulitzer. It is really hard to explain the feelings I got when watching A Home... Though the movie is depressing and heart-breaking, I left feeling warm and pleasantly nostalgic of my life.

What is love, how is it defined and what are its boundaries?

Love should be open and free-willed, not labeled or extreme, as seen in A Home... The main character loves everyone and would give his life to them if they so chose. However, all the other characters need a label of what "traditional" love is and are unsatisfied otherwise. I cannot imagine all the people I love to die or leave me. I would not be able to have the life viewed in the film.

E-string

I have been here in NYC a week. It seems like a lot longer--maybe that is because I already know how this city works or maybe the fact I ride the subway at least 2+ hours a day visitng friends and such. I am really grateful to have a nice place with REALLY chill roommates here in Washington Heights. I have come to realize over the years that roommates make or break a living situation. When you have good roommates, it is nice to come home and just slump on the couch. This is much nicer than trying to avoid your roommates and locking yourself up in your room all night. ie. my apartment in cincinnati...

I have already had a couple of neat experiences that I am not really at liberty to talk about until they actually happen! I am pretty excited though (more about that later).

Why is Brahms so difficult! Out of all the composers, I struggle with him the most. I look back on when I played the E-flat viola sonata in my undergrad and remember how much I struggled with the "character" of Brahms. I mean, not to boast, I have heard people who play the character FLAWLESSLY but are reals out of tune. I listen to my recital and for the most part, I am in tune, but I sound so timid and shy. Brahms really shattered my confidence level, and it has taken a long time to overcome that! Anyway, it taught me a great deal. Back on track, I am learning the Brahms A minor string quartet. At first, I was a little bummed this would be the quartet I'd be playing, thinking it was not that challenging (especially after playing Beethoven Op.131 at CCM), but after practicing, I am in for an uphill battle! Come on little salmon! It is SO awkward. There is no good fingereing for the opening measures and throughout the entire four movements, you have to contorte your hand. Why Brahms? WHY?! It is fun though. It gives me something to work on.

On that note, I am learning the Franck Violin Sonata, which I love, and it has been great. Also on the summer list of things to learn are Bax's Fantasy Sonata for Viola and Harp, Schubert's Arppegione Sonata (can you believe I haven't played that...) and Beethoven's Spring Violin Sonata.

[Insert a Bill and Ted movie title here]

So, I woke up in the city that doesn't sleep. Hoorah! It wasn't in my own place though...

Helene and I drove the 12 hours from Cincinnati to New York via West Virgigina (one more state off the 50 list), Penny and the Jerse-ster. Also, though quite crowded, it was fun to drive through the Lincoln tunnel. It reminded me of fifth grade and my obsession with that little-known disaster movie called Daylight. Man, that movie is good. However, as I see it now, there are many similarites between this Lincoln-Tunnel-Explodes flick and Poseiedon Adventure. Why do my favorite characters always die because they get hypothermia or die a water related death? Poor Shelly Winters.

I am very blessed that my car did not get broken into with all the crap in there (and a TV). It is all empty now, well, it is now full of groceries, an ironing board and my N64, but you get the point.

I am in Connecticut at my parent's house for the last time. They are moving all the way back to Arizona near Tucson. It is funny how things come full circle or the fact my family always leaves when I move near. Austyn and D are also moving with their fam back to Utah so D-dawg can go to graduate school at BYU. SURPRISE!

I am excited to be in New York and to see where my dreams take me (doesn't everyone say that?). I would like to get a job to help the time pass before NYU's String Quartet Program, but I feel the three weeks from the end of June to the middle of July will cause companies to not hire me. Maybe I should just stick to the plan and practice viola and slave at violin! Should call for a most excellent adventure!

It tastes like soap but it doesn't take like soap

I have always had a thing for artistic movies, but I have this new fascination with "crtierion" films, putting them on mute and watching them with different music. It is great to put on an LP and see how the indie/alternative music lines up with the motion on screen. Do we look for connections or is there an inner drive that aligns all the different arts? It is fascinating. All music seems to be comprised of beats. Dance also seems to be comprised of rhythm. Motion therefore has to have a inner rhtyhm/beat as well, otherwise all three art forms of visual, movement and auditorary would not be able to seamlessly align. I was watching Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake and had Regina Spektor's Begin to Hope on. Very crazy how well they worked together.

It's raining, it's pouring

Midterms are over! Hallelujah.

I hate school. Is that really wrong of me to say? This quarter, however, is much more interesting in the world of classical musician classes over here at CCM. I have two teachers who have heavy accents and crack jokes. It is nice to look forward to a class at 9a in the morning (Do I look forward to it, or am I just a good student who enjoyes watching youtube videos of Bel Canto singers and trailers for Wagner operas?). My theory teacher, Dr. Sam Ng, is hysterical. He makes learning about counterpoint fun and the art of crafting fugues not dull.

It really sucks to be in school for another month when your undergraduate colleagues have been out for several weeks. On top of all this, it is raining almost everyday. April showers should bring May flowers, but so far, it has brought more rain. I enjoy recieving the one sunny day here and there. It makes me appreciate the ability to feel the warm sun. Let's just throw a little optimism in.

My recital is coming up. I have had a couple roadblocks (namely some rough lessons), but I have held my own and practiced with more concentration so I can give the best recital I can. Granted, I never perform a recital without flaws, no one does unless you are Hillary Hahn (but she even says she messes up), but I want to represent myself well.

The Ligeti is completely learned. That piece is very difficult, and SOUNDS difficult. It pays off!

The Rubbra is mostly learned, I just still need to find a pianist...hopefully sooner rather than later. This piece is passionate and beautiful--something the viola repertoire desperately needs.

I go to New York tomorrow. I am SO excited. More about that later.

For sure

I am for sure giving a recital May 29 at 6P in 3250.
I am for sure going to New York City at the begnning of June.
I am for sure doing NYU's String Quartet Workshop.

Things I am not sure of:
Am I going to stay in New York after the summer?
Am I going to get into IFCP?
Am I going to get a job in New York?

I did hear back from IFCP. I am at the top of the wait list. wah wah. That is alright. I will see in a couple weeks.

Takács Boosts

Today my quartet played for the Takács Quartet. The masterclass was very uplifting and a great experience to have professionals compliment our playing. The things they had to say are very helpful and encouraging. I am not one to boast, but it is ALWAYS reassuring when you have positive interactions with musicians. So often I spend hours alone all day correcting myself, getting mad at myself or becoming frustrated. I work hard and go to lessons where teachers tell me things I need to correct. It is always a fix-this-fix-that mindset. So, when someone gives me praise for my playing and only comments on musicality, it is a pat on the back and a morale booster!

On another note, I have still not heard back from IFCP. I am starting to wonder if I ever will.

I am 95% sure I am choosing to go to New York for the summer, especially after today, even though I have already been convinced. The NYU String Quartet Workshop seems to be a wonderful idea, as does working in the city trying to make some connections or at least LEARNING about what I need to fix in my playing/how to break into the scene.

The last of my MT friends left for New York. It is already weird and the usualities of my day have changed... I cannot wait until I see them again. I am still happy, which is always a good thing. The anticipation of a reunion is keeping me chugging along. Luckily I am giving a recital this quarter so I have something to keep me focused and to keep my free time down to a minimum (that, and I am actually doing ALL the reading for my history class! Wow, I myself am even impressed at that one).